MotoGP 07

The first big surprise of picking up the MotoGP box is the publisher's logo in the corner. Wait, Capcom picked it up? It's usually EA that takes a big title then releases new versions of it again and again, year after year, with only marginal changes. Oh wait. The whole Mega Man Street Fighter Resident Evil thing.

Moving on. The '07 season of MotoGP is now over and Capcom is probably hoping that a few more Australians are looking at picking up some sweet gaming merch. After all, 22 year old Kurri Kurri boy Casey Stoner secured this year's winning trophy with three whole races to spare.

The problem is, racing bike simulations don't exactly have a history of being pick up and play titles. Cars are easy, they only have the steering, brake and throttle to worry about. But on a motorbike you also have to worry about weight distribution. You can throw yourself around like a cordial charged slam dancer when you're strapped behind the wheel of a souped up WRX and it won't make a lick of a difference. But try the same thing on an 800cc Ducati and you'll find yourself hurtling towards a tyre wall on one wobbly front wheel.

Out of kindness to the first time racers, MotoGP offers a tutorial race upon start up. After "monitoring" your racing style for a lap or two, the game will suggest a handling mode that suits your skill level. In short, if your rider spends most of his time death tumbling into the gravel pits, the game will helpfully suggest "arcade mode". If you manage to find the brakes at some point, it will suggest "Advanced". Differentiate between the front and rear brakes (oddly defaulted to square and R2 respectively) and the game will suggest "Simulation mode".

The biggest difference in Arcade mode is in the weight distribution. The bike feels heavy and sticky, with very little variation when you lean your rider back and forward. A little like a two wheeled car, strangely enough. This is in stark contrast to the other two modes, where accelerating without leaning forward can quickly turn a wheelie into a back flip, counter pointing on your head. Or in reverse, braking hard without leaning back can result in an uncontrollable "endo" or nose stand, which inevitably throws your rider face first into the tarmac.

This leaves Arcade mode as dull as radio golf coverage by comparison. It doesn't mean that you get to powerslide around each hairpin in an impossible drift or gain speed by hitting boost markers, It just strips any vague enjoyment out of one of the ugliest racing games to hit the PS2 since it had a "2" in its name.

Did I mention that before? The whole ugly thing? MotoGP 07 features some of the most uninteresting patches of green and tan ever before seen in a racing game, a fact compounded by viewing some of the more famous tracks like Laguna Seca in another title.

None of this makes the gameplay bad, of course. There's a steep learning curve, sure, but once you get the hang of the mechanics there is some fun to be had. It's just that the visual blandness of MotoGP seems to highlight all the other parts of the game where there's an absence of fun.

For starters, the sensation of speed is not great, the direct result of a low framerate. What's more, the championship mode simply consists of a points table and 18 races, with cheesy tourist videos as your only segue. That's right, no podium videos, no money earned, no damage and no upgrades. And what about commentary? It's always been the best way to make a dull sport seem more interesting: "holds it...holds it...HOLDS IT!" Unfortunately, there's none to be found.

For the diehards who already have this game on pre order anyway, things get a little better. Every single track and rider from the '07 season is present, and they perform as similarly to their real life counterparts. In addition to the arcade mode, there's also an Xbox-style 100 point achievement list, which extends the longevity of the no frills championship mode considerably.

For the rest of us, it's not going to be enough. Perhaps the best way to sum up this game is the sole portrait of '06 champion Valentino Rossi that appears constantly while the game loads. Frozen into an unrecognisable grin, he seems to say, "Yeah, I'm here. But I'm not sure if I want to be."